Blame Laurence…he’s the dumb-ass this time.

Pretty brave of “Wavves” to ditch the fuzzy, distorted sound for their third record in favor of a sound where you can actually hear the lyrics, huh? I think it’s a wise decision. While it’s disheartening to see a band “grow up” a bit and normalize, I wonder how much longer they could have done fuzzy noise without making them look like a one-trick pony. It’s interesting that they did this after imploding on stage in Europe last year. More importantly, I can’t wait to see how Pitchfork reviews the album. I predict one of their famous 0.0 reviews. Personally, I think it sounds pretty good.

Do you even know what I’m talking about?

So welcome to This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic book and some days are fuzzier than others.

MONDAY

First Issues

Batman Beyond #1 (Of 6)

(Adam Beechen/Ryan Benjamin)

DC Comics

I’m sure this is of interest to someone. Not to me, though — Batman Beyond was a cool cartoon but I have no interest in watching it rendered in comic book form by people who’ve nothing to do with the cartoon — which I liked-not-loved to begin with. So, um… Yeah. Batman Beyond.

TUESDAY

Ugh, No Interesting Manga This Week. Instead…

Yours Truly Jack The Ripper #1 (of 3)

(Robert Bloch/Joe R. Lansdale/John L. Lansdale/Kevin Colden)

IDW Publishing

First of all, how badass is that cover? Secondly, how many From Hell comparisons will this book receive? Apparently it’s an adaptation of a pulp novel by Robert Bloch, so hopefully very few. It’s got some serious talent behind it.

WEDNESDAY

Mainstream Superhero Stuff

Wonder Woman #600

(J. Michael Straczynski/Geoff Johns/Gail Simone/George Perez/Phil Jimenez/Joe Madureira/Others)

DC Comics

Wow, a Batman centennial issue, then a Superman one, and now a Wonder Woman issue? The Batman one was good and the Superman one I skimmed just to get to the J. Michael Straczynski story (ugh). As for Wonder Woman? Well, to be honest I forgot they still published Wonder Woman comics.

THURSDAY

Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Action Comics #890

(Paul Cornell/Pete Woods)

DC Comics

Hey, I’m as surprised as you are that Action Comics is relevant enough to peek it’s head into this article. You can thank the new creative team for that. Paul Cornell is the severely underrated writer who gave us Captain Britain and MI:13 as well as some pretty good episodes of Doctor Who. Pete Woods is a talented artist who needs a big break so he can be a household name. Maybe this run will be it. Also, this series is all about Lex Luthor. Yes.

FRIDAY

TGIF(uckin’ finally)

Astonishing X-Men #34/Captain Swing and the Electrical Pirates of Cindery Island #2

(Warren Ellis/Phil Jimenez)/(Warren Ellis)

Marvel Comics/Avatar Press

Warren Ellis has a lot of unfinished comics out these days — Fell, Desolation Jones, Supergod, Anna Mercury, New Universal, lots more — some thanks to a traumatic computer crash, others due to who knows/who cares. What’s important is sometimes comics don’t go unfinished, and now these two are back for now. I forgot what happened in Astonishing X-Men and Captain Swing was pretty cool. Yay.

SATURDAY

Essential Reading

Shade the Changing Man Volume 3: Scream Time

(Peter Milligan/Chris Bachalo/Bryan Talbot/Mark Pennington/Rick Bryant/Jamie Hewlett)

Vertigo/DC Comics

Shade the Changing Man: it is great. Read it and love it as I do. I’m still ecstatic that they’re finally collecting these, as I am a Peter Milligan #1 “super-fan”.

SUNDAY

I Forgot to Look for Last Issues, So Here’s Another First Issue

Green Hornet Parallel Lives #1

(Jai Nitz/Nigel Raynor)

Dynamite

Dynamite, y’all need to cool it.

Danny Djeljosevic

In 2009 Blur reformed after kind of going on hiatus a bit after releasing 2003’s brilliant Think Tank which is perfect night driving music. They played a few shows during the summer (Hyde Park, Glastonbury), and called it quits again. On April 17, 2010 Blur released a 7” single called “Fool’s Day” completely out of nowhere. And it’s pretty good. Funny that they say they’re recording an album and decide to break up, but then they reform, break up again, and then release a single. Of course, these are the same boys who created Britpop and quickly abandoned it to be indie art-rockers.

Welcome to This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic and you can download “Fool’s Day” for free at http://blur.co.uk

MONDAY

First Issues

DV8 Gods & Monsters #1 (of 8 )

(Brian Wood/Rebekah Isaacs)

Wildstorm/DC Comics

Brian Wood doing a superhero comic? That hasn’t happened in a looong while. Back when he did superhero comics he was a relative newbie and Warren Ellis collaborator, and now he’s doing a comic that Warren Ellis created. Peachy keen!

Dv8, under Ellis’ original 8-issue run, was a very Warren Ellis concept: superpeople using their powers for purely selfish reasons. They were major assholes, and I only hope Wood continues the tradition.

TUESDAY

New Manga Day

Kingyo Used Books Volume 1

(Seimu Yoshizaki)

Viz Media

Thank heavens for Viz’s Signature line, which publishes books that appeal to me. For example, Kingyo Used Books, which is about a used manga shop and how the books people buy affect their lives — usually for the better. I love the idea of self-reflexive manga because it’s a world I know little about outside of the final product.

You know what’s a good manga about manga? Bakuman, which is about two kids trying to break in as creators. It teaches a lot about how the manga industry works. I think that comes out in July of this year.

WEDNESDAY

Mainstream Superhero Stuff

Spirit #1

(Mark Schultz/Moritat/Dennis O’Neil/Bill Sienkiewicz)

DC Comics

…and DC again attempts to make people care about The Spirit. We all know The Spirit is important and that Will Eisner is a giant amongst ants in the comic book word, but I doubt the average fan is as interested in Eisner and his work as much as the people who Spirit comics are.

I dunno if the last series was any good after Darwyn Cooke finished up — but 32 issues of Darwyn Cooke, Mark Evanier, Sergio Aragones, Mike Ploog, and Paul Smith doesn’t sound so bad. This new one’s by Mark Schultz, famous for Xenozoic Tales/Cadillacs and Dinosaurs, who I have no familiarity with outside of reputation. I’m a bit more excited for the back-up story, The Spirit: Black and White, featuring a different notable creative team every month. This time it’s Denny O’Neill and Bill Sienkiewicz, which sounds amazing. A cover by Landrönn doesn’t hurt, either.

THURSDAY

Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Crossed Family Values #1 (of 6)

(David Lapham/Javier Barreno)

Avatar Press

It’s always nice to see David Lapham working because, despite creating brilliant comics like Young Liars and Stray Bullets, he’s a bit underrated. His newest series, Sparta USA, seems heir to the weirdness of Young Liars, and now he’s doing a spin-off of Garth Ennis’ Crossed, which is a supremely fu*@ed up pseudo-zombie comic. Even more underrated is Lapham’s tendency for the fu*@ed up, so I’m really, really looking forward to his take on the world of Crossed.

FRIDAY

TGIT(he people who made this comic)

Captain America: Who Won’t Wield The Shield #1

(Stuart Moore/Matt Fraction/Jason Aaron/Brendan McCarthy/Joe Quinones/Mirco Pierfederici)

Marvel Comics

Three comedy stories about unlikely candidates becoming Captain America. This is going to be very fun. I don’t know how funny Stuart Moore and Jason Aaron are, but Matt Fraction — besides being generally funny — cut his teeth doing a series of hilarious comedy/espionage comics called Rex Mantooth, Kung-Fu Gorilla. Oh, and Brendan McCarthy’s drawing Fraction’s contribution to. So it will be hilarious and well-drawn.

You should buy The Annotated Mantooth! because it’s totally punk rock and AiT/Planet Lar publishes it at a very affordable price.

SATURDAY

Essential Reading

100%

(Paul Pope)

Vertigo/DC Comics

You know who’s a brilliant artist? Paul Pope. Vertigo’s finally released his 100% in softcover format, so you should totally but it and read it and love it. Don’t ask me what it’s about, because I don’t know. I don’t need to know what a Paul Pope comic is about to buy the thing.

SUNDAY

No last issues this week, so read this not-a-comic instead

Do Anything Volume 1: Jack Kirby Ripped My Flesh

(Warren Ellis)

Avatar Press

Warren Ellis is no stranger to columns, having written for Comic Book Resources, Suicide Girls and Wired UK. But his best column is Do Anything, written for Rich Johnston’s Bleeding Cool website. Subtitled “Thoughts on Comics and Things,” Do Anything discusses  comics, the people who create them, David Bowie, and the disembodied head of Jack Kirby, among other things and manages to make all sorts of mind-blowing connections in the process.

Now Avatar Press has collected Ellis’ first phase of writings under the Do Anything banner in an affordable softcover collection, which I’m totally going to buy even though I’ve read it all already. It’s just that good.

But if you want to be a cheap bastard and read the thing online, go ahead. http://www.bleedingcool.com/category/do-anything-by-warren-ellis/

Danny Djeljosevic

That The Decemberists went full on prog rock opera for The Hazards of Love shouldn’t have surprised anyone with ears, but I imagine a lot of their fans just wanted another album of sea shanties and Victorian hookers. You can hear them play a bit with prog rock in Castaways and Cut outs in “California One/Youth and Beauty Brigade,” where the first song seamlessly transitions into the second. Then they tested the waters some more with their EP The Tain. Then they threw a couple of song cycles into The Crane Wife that ended up better than a lot of the album’s standalone tracks.

So welcome to This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic book, and I really hope that the next Decemberists record scales back the proggyness a bit, just for the sake of not disappearing into increasing obscurity. You know, for the casual fans.

Oh, right. Comics.

MONDAY

First Issues

Shuddertown #1

(Nick Spencer/Adam Geen)

Image Comics

It must be pretty good to be Nick Spencer these past few weeks. His amazing miniseries Forgetless is in full swing, they might be making a movie out of his Existence 2.0, and now he’s got the first issue of Shuddertown out this week. Shuddertown is a crime comic about a troubled cop venturing into the titular projects. I love crime, and after Forgetless I’m willing to read anything Spencer does.

TUESDAY

No Interesting Manga This Week, So…

The Art Of Jaime Hernandez: The Secrets Of Life And Death

(Todd Hignite)

Abrams ComicArts

Chances are I like Love & Rockets more than I like you. But don’t feel bad — I like Love & Rockets more than a lot of things. Unfortunately, I only got into the book recently so I have nearly 30 years of material to catch up on. But don’t let that scare you away, people who know the ins and outs of X-Men Continuity. There’s a lot less to understand and it actually makes sense.

But that doesn’t have much to do with the book in question. The Art of Jaime Hernandez collets lots of sketches, drawings, and unpublished work, so it’s a must for fans. I can’t wait to check it out.

WEDNESDAY

Mainstream Superhero Stuff

Green Lantern #52

(Geoff Johns/Doug Mahnke/Christian Alamy)

DC Comics

For the record, I still don’t care about “Blackest Night” and can’t wait for it to be over. As the event nears completion I look forward to “Brightest Day” only to see what the hell it is. At this point I’m more interested in how DC attempts to manage and direct its fictional universe more than what actually happens within it. Fans seem to like it because (the haughty blogger generalized) it brings grim ‘n’ gritty to the much sunnier DCU and brings up lots of old continuity I can’t begin to care about even though I understand a great deal of it. Also, because DC keeps giving out free toys.

THURSDAY

Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Supergod #3 (of 5)

(Warren Ellis/Garrie Gastony)

Avatar Press

Finally Supergod returns — I though I was missing issues at first but it turns out they just weren’t coming out. Being a Warren Ellis comic, it’s mean and darkly hilarious. Give it to anyone who likes superheroes to free them from that terrible disease.

FRIDAY

TGIM(ark Millar, sometimes)

Nemesis #1 (of 4)

(Mark Millar/Steve McNiven)

Icon/Marvel Comics

Forgive me for being obvious, but I’m really looking forward to Nemesis. Mark Millar is an interesting fellow, being one of the more controversial figures in comics and a guy who actively tries to get movies of his stuff made. I’ve just realized that a lot of his notable work is surprisingly meta, taking superheroes and remixing them into different contexts. What if some comic nerd decided to be a superhero? What if supervillains had taken over the world behind our backs? What if The Avengers were a slick Hollywood blockbuster? What if superheroes waged war on one another?

As you know, the basic pitch of Nemesis is — and I quote — “What if Batman was a total cunt?”

Enjoy.

SATURDAY

Essential Reading

Phonogram: The Singles Club TPB

(Kieron Gillen/Jamie McKelvie)

Image Comics

A couple weeks ago Kieron Gillen announced that The Singles Club would be the last Phonogram story for many reasons including that nobody was reading the thing. This makes me very sad (about the end) and angry (at the people who should have been reading Phonogram but weren’t). Maybe

If I don’t hope, I blog. You don’t like me when I blog.

SUNDAY

Last Issues

FVZA #3 (of 3)

(David Hine/Roy Martinez)

Radical Publishing

Federal Vampire and Zombie Agency, huh? Look, as long as you keep not taking this comic book thing seriously I’ll keep writing about music in my comic book column.

Solo records are funny things. Some of them show you an artist stripped of her band as she explores her interests. Often the extreme happens, where, free of his band, the artist releases an entire album of self-indulgent wanking set to music. People hated Lou Reed’s first self-titled album, a collection of unused Velvet Underground songs he tried to re-appropriate. Transformer, however, is a classic with songs like “Walk on the Wild Side” and “New York Telephone Conversation.” Julian Casablancas of The Strokes, who sounds a bit like Lou Reed, released a solo record whose first three tracks are brilliant but the rest of it is kind of not-so-good. Does that mean Casablancas follow-up might be his Transformer? Will anyone care by then?

To tie this into comics — which I totally don’t have to do if I don’t want to — the comic book equivalent of the solo record would most be the artist writing and drawing his own work. All my favorite artists — a.k.a. the ones I mention in this column every week — do work of their own in addition to drawing other people’s scripts. They do it a lot in manga, too. Frank Miller didn’t become Frank Miller until he went solo on Daredevil after drawing a couple scripts of someone else’s.

These are the things that interest me.

So welcome to This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic book and only some of them are solo records.

MONDAY

First Issues

Green Hornet #1

(Kevin Smith/Phil Hester/Jonathan Lau)

Dynamite Entertainment

We may be at the point where Kevin Smith’s comic books are better than his movies if Cop Out is any indication (pray that it’s just a fluke of awfulness). Most surprising is that his comics come out on time which, as you might remember, used to be a problem a few years ago.

As I understand it, Green Hornet is Kevin Smith’s original Green Hornet screenplay in comic book form, which both intrigues and horrifies me — intrigues because I’d like to see Smith’s original vision for the film that Seth Rogen, Evan Goldberg and Michel Gondry will surely do much better; terrifies because, well, it’s a Kevin Smith action movie and he’s not good when it comes to action.

Maybe he should take a hint from the comics and hire someone to handle the visual element of his movies while he directs the actors. Sometimes Simon needs his Garfunkel. Or, more accurately, Garfunkel needs his Simon.

TUESDAY

New Manga Day

Cactus’s Secret Volume 1

(Nana Haruta)

Viz Media

Cactus’s Secret is a manga I chose for this week’s column based on name alone. I like cactuses, especially the anthropomorphic kind. Remember Cactuar from Final Fantasy? Amingo from Marvel vs. Capcom 2? Anyway, it’s not clear if there are any cactuses in Cactus’s Secret aside from figurative ones. It’s apparently about a girl whose love interest is too dim to realize she’s after him. It’s a fairly common trope of manga, I’ve realized.

WEDNESDAY

Mainstream Superhero Stuff

First Wave #1 (of 6)

(Brian Azzarello/Rags Morales)

DC Comics

Even though it was a pretty standard superhero team-up story, I dug the Batman/Doc Savage one-shot that introduced this pulp/noir-style DC Universe where nobody really has superpowers and Batman, The Spirit, The Shadow and Doc Savage all hang out. I can dig First Wave provided Brian Azzarello makes it fun and not, I dunno, Identity Crisis (sorry, Rags).

THURSDAY

Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Invincible Iron Man #24

(Matt Fraction/Salvador Larroca)

Marvel Comics

Have I made it obvious that I love Invincible Iron Man? Superhero comics wish they were as smart, exciting and cool as Invincible Iron Man. People wish Invincible Iron Man was a person so it could sweep us off our feet and into bed — all while wearing sunglasses.

Issue #24 concludes the wonderful “Stark: Disassembled” story arc, wherein Tony Stark is in a persistent vegetative state and his friends try to resurrect him while Norman Osborn and other baddies want to put a stop to that. Matt Fraction’s stories thus far have all been about subjecting Tony Stark to the biggest, most insurmountable odds — which is how superhero comics should be.

FRIDAY

TGIF(orgetless)

Forgetless #3 (of 5)

(Nick Spencer)

Image Comics

I’m very cool, and here’s how I know: first, I’ve already read Forgetless #3. Secondly, I know Forgetless is awesome. It’s super-cool, has fantastic art and takes place at a dance club. It’s got models-turned-assassins and teenagers just looking to party.

SATURDAY

Essential Reading

Planetary Volume 4 Hardcover

(Warren Ellis/John Cassaday)

Wildstorm/DC Comics

The final volume of Warren Ellis’ survey of 20^th century pop culture. I only discovered Planetary last year after years of hearing how brilliant was, and was FLOORED — a popular superhero(ish) comic where the characters are archeologists? Where every issue comments on a different aspect of genre fiction — especially comics? Planetary is great stuff, and I can’t wait for the softcover edition of this. It’s not a grueling wait, considering how long it took for this to conclude.

SUNDAY

Last Issues

Crossed #9 (of 9)

(Garth Ennis)

Avatar Press

Crossed, one of Garth Ennis’ meanest comics in years, is ending. The book is Ennis’ take on the zombie genre where the infected are hyperviolent and say very nasty things to the survivors. I suppose it’s a bit like The Crazies, a movie which I have never seen but, hey, now there’s a remake.

If Crossed #9 doesn’t make you cry from sheer insensitivity, I’ll let you eat my hat.

Does the lack of ambient tracks on Lodger bother anyone else? Obviously after the brilliance of Low and “Heroes” the Eno/Bowie collaboration was starting to wane on Lodger, but the lack of ambient tracks makes it feel more like another transition record a la Young Americans to Station to Station. Except this time it’d be a transition to Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps), which isn’t very similar to Lodger, from what I remember.

So welcome to This Week in Comics, which has nothing to do with David Bowie.

MONDAY

First Issues

Choker #1

(Ben Templesmith/Ben McCool)

Image Comics

Reasons you should buy Choker:

• -Ben Templesmith
• -It takes place in a town called Shotgun City
• -Templesmith: “So what is CHOKER? Well, for one thing, it’s sort of like FELL, but with it’s face ripped off and a bad dose of gonorrhea.”
• -It’s a hardboiled noir story about an ex-cop with Alien Hand Syndrome
• -One of the characters is nicknamed “Dick Puncher.”
• -Ben Templesmith
• -If you don’t very nasty things will happen…to you

TUESDAY

New Manga Day

Bobobo-Bo Bo-Bobo Volume 3 GN

(Yoshio Sawai)

Viz Media

For the record, Bobobo-Bo Bo-Bobo is one of my favorite titles of anything ever. I haven’t read the manga, but I used to catch the anime on Cartoon Network from time to time and thought it was made by crazy people. In other words, I give it a ringing endorsement.

WEDNESDAY

Mainstream Superhero Stuff — Sometimes good, sometimes stuff I make fun of

Blackest Night #7 (of

(Geoff Johns/Ivan Reis/Oclair Albert)

DC Comics

Just keep repeating to yourself: One more month and this will ALL be over.

THURSDAY

Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Batman & Robin #9

(Grant Morrison/Cameron Stewart)

DC Comics

We got TWO issues of Batman and Robin in February. You know what that says to me? GREATEST MONTH EVER

That is because Batman and Robin is very good. It is even better when Cameron Stewart is drawing it. Stewart’s got a wonderfully cartoony style that works as an antidote to every bad piece of comic art there ever was.

FRIDAY

TGIT(hat Title, Among Other Things)

Captain Swing & The Electrical Pirates of Cindery Island #1 (of 4)

(Warren Ellis/Raulo Caceres)

Avatar Press

A retrofuturist 19^th Century London. Drawn by Raulo Caceres who did Crécy. Written by Warren Ellis. Look, we all know Ellis writes 28 books a month, but he announced that things will be quiet on the comics front next year once he starts working on the Gravel screenplay, among other things. So let’s enjoy Warren Ellis comics while we have them.

SATURDAY

Essential Reading

Popgun Volume 4

(Lots and Lots and Lots of People)

Image Comics

For 30 bucks, a (HUGE) volume of Popgun gives you lots of stories from a variety of genres by various creators both known and unknown. You’ll hate some, but you’ll love others. There are lots of creators just waiting for you to discover and enjoy, so buy a volume of Popgun and broaden your horizons or something.

SUNDAY

Last Issues

Flash Rebirth #6 (Of 6)

(Geoff Johns/Ethan Van Sciver)

DC Comics

I forgot this was being published. But now it’s over and a new Flash series shall begin. It’s weird that every person who’s been The Flash is currently alive. Kind of betrays the whole idea of a “legacy” character, don’t you think? Not to mention cheapens the guy at the center of it when you have 12 other people who do the same exact thing. Unless you’re writing The Flash as some kind of Superhero Starbucks within the DCU. Which could be a fun idea. But that won’t happen in this comic.

First of all, for some reason I’m obsessed with formats this week. I suppose this time I’m writing as a consumer instead of my usual “This is good please buy it why are you ruining comics by buying Marvel Zombies” shtick. I know it’s hard to read comics, Internet, because of all the options: single issues, hardcover collections, softcovers, and shelf-porn prestige editions? Which is right for you?

So welcome to This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic book, but every comic book is a different size.

MONDAY

First Issues. Also, what the hell–

Hit-Monkey #1

(Daniel Way/Dalibor Talajic)

Marvel Comics

Honestly, I have no idea what to say about this weird little one-shot. Marvel clearly commissioned Hit-Monkey comic for their Digital Comics service for a cheap laff, but I guess it was popular enough that it was deemed suitable to be placed on glossy paper and put on a shelf so human hands could touch it. Most impressive about this book is Dalibor Talajic’s art, which is serious business and makes the book look like an action crime comic. But remember, this shit costs four bucks. Someone better hire that Talajic guy for something worthwhile.

TUESDAY

New Manga Day, Or Old Manga in a New Package Day.

Inu Yasha Volume 2 (VIZBIG Edition)

(Rumiko Takahashi)

Viz Media

Remember, kids: manga volumes are about 10 bucks a pop, so Viz has the right idea putting several volumes into one book, especially when the comics in question are long-running series with dozens of volumes. I like Dragon Ball, but I don’t want to have to by every single tiny volume, which I can breeze through in about ten minutes anyway. I want 500-page chunks! Chunks! So, multi-volume editions: good. As for Inu Yasha itself, I have absolutely no opinion.

WEDNESDAY

Mainstream Superhero Stuff.

Batman & Robin #8

(Grant Morrison/Cameron Stewart)

DC Comics

Realize that last issue of Batman & Robin came out two weeks ago and already they’re giving us another delicious fix. Did we do something right? How do we keep this up? Can we create a clone of Cameron Stewart so he can draw this book forever? Why isn’t this text document answering any questions I type into it?

THURSDAY

Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting.

All-Star Superman Volume 2

(Grant Morrison/Frank Quitely/Jamie Grant)

DC Comics

When I realized that the inevitable Absolute Edition of All-Star Superman would cost $100, I decided that prestige is hardly practical. You can’t lend anyone your Absolute Edition of anything — they’re gigantic and it actually matters if your friend bends a page or dents the cover. So let’s all save our money by buying the cheap editions of comics we love so everyone can enjoy. All-Star Superman’s a comic meant to be handed out, beat up, and appreciated — not hermetically sealed in a slipcase on somebody’s shelf.

NOTE: For this reason I also don’t believe in putting my comics in mylar bags. They’re like creepy little gimp suits.

FRIDAY

TGINextwave. A Lot.

Nextwave: Agents Of H.A.T.E. Ultimate Collection

(Warren Ellis/Stuart Immonen)

Marvel Comics

I can live with two volumes of All-Star Superman, but I’d like the zany antics of Nextwave contained within one book, please. It helps that it’s $35 and you can still pass it around to your friends. By collecting a rag-tag group of largely ignored characters and dropping them in the hazardous territory of a Warren Ellis comic book, Nextwave manages to be funnier than every Deadpool appearance ever. Combined. The only drawback is that when the original trades were published Volume 2 was titled “I Kick Your Face,” which would look lovely on anybody’s shelf. Especially mine.

SATURDAY

Essential Reading. No, Really Essential.

Hicksville (Definitive Edition)

(Dylan Horrocks)

Drawn & Quarterly

When I was in college, Dylan Horrocks came into my Comics & Animation class to talk about, well comics. It was an enlightening talk, mostly because he dispelled the belief that you have to be a superb draughtsman to draw comics. Really, you just have to keep drawing until you develop a consistent, interesting style. Previously unfamiliar with his work, I quickly ordered a copy of Hicksville. It’s a brilliant comic book about comic books, which you don’t see very often. It doesn’t seem like there’s any new content aside from the cover and a new introduction, so I’m relieved I don’t have to buy it again — but honestly I probably would if I had to. Hicksville is THAT good.

SUNDAY

Last Issues, But Not Least Issues.

Phonogram: The Singles Club #7 (of 7)

(Kieron Gillen/Jamie McKelvie)

Image Comics

Phonogram was one of my favorite discoveries of 2009. A comic book about music? And it’s not starring Kiss? This miniseries of standalone stories got me hooked with the one about The Long Blondes, so I picked up the first volume, the long(er)-form Rue Brittania, which happened to be all about Britpop. It’s like Gillon and McKelvie make comics just for me. Thanks guys.

Happy New Year, Internet, and welcome to the first 2010 edition of This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic book, but you can’t read them with the corresponding days because they all come out on Wednesday. Oops. To remind you what each day means, I’ve thrown in several subtitles for each day. Because I love you.

Since I ended last year’s edition with a quick “best of the year” list, I feel like I could make some wild prognostications about comics this year.

Dark Horse Comics will continue to live up to its name by publishing proper good comics that I like. This will prove doubly true if The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys comes out this year.

Ditto Image Comics, especially if Casanova returns this year.

With the conclusion of “Siege,” the Marvel Comics universe will see an end to “Dark Reign” and a return to a traditional status quo after the last several years of Bush-era pessimism. In lieu of constant tie-in books, Marvel Comics will be printed with an ink containing a highly addictive drug absorbed through the skin. In this sense, “Dark Reign” won’t end, but simply change forms.

In the next DC Comics crossover, probably written by Geoff Johns, Wonder Woman will get raped by Darkseid to show that the dark god of the planet Apokalips is truly as evil as we think. While the pundits and bloggers will decry this offensive attempt by DC to seem “darker” and more “adult,” the crossover will outsell even “Blackest Night” due to each issue’s inclusion of a small packet of chewable vitamins in the shape of all your favorite DC Comics rape scenes.

This year we may see Geoff Johns really put off his fan-base, and not because of all the rape.

By sheer amount of output alone, it’s inevitable that BOOM! Studios will release a comic book I unabashedly love instead of just really enjoy. This might happen in 2010. I’m not sure.

MONDAY – First Issues, New Beginnings, This Week Might Not Suck After All If Monday’s Any Indication

The Muppet Show Comic Book #1

(Roger Langridge)

BOOM! Studios

Huzzah! The Muppet Show comic proper is back with a new number one, wherein Roger Langridge remains faithful to the sketch comedy format of The Muppet Show while drawing the characters in his distinct style instead of attempting to draw the characters as they appear in real life. It’s a surprising dost of artistic license that I wish more licensed comics would take. Also, I wish more licensed comic books had Muppets. Are you listening, IDW and Dark Horse?

Hint: I grew up with Archie’s Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles comics, which developed its own continuity independent of both the cartoon and the original Mirage Studios comics.

TUESDAY – New Manga Day, Which is Always On Tuesday, Also Sometimes I Choose Two Manga Effectively Making it “Twosday”

Yakitate!! Japan Volume 21

(Takashi Hashiguchi)

Viz Media

Cooking manga! I would buy every cooking manga there is if I had lots of disposable income. Until then, I’ll have to live with reading about them and imagining what could be. Yakitate!! Japan is about a 16-year-old boy who has superhuman baking skills and seeks to put Japan on the map when it comes to bread baking. That sounds delicious. I want to eat this comic. To me, food manga is porn.

AND

Switch Volume 12

(Otoh Saki/Tomomi Nakamura)

Viz Media

Here’s a manga that isn’t about weird transformations, robots, or demon punching. It’s a cop comic about a pair of youthful looking newbie detectives (one of whom has a “violent alter ego”) tracking a drug called Dragon Speed. Dragon Speed! My god.

WEDNESDAY- New Comic Day in the US, Mainstream Superhero Stuff, Middle of the Week

Invincible Iron Man #22

(Matt Fraction/Salvador Larocca)

Marvel Comics

Look, I try not to repeat myself, but this is a slow week. So I’m going to gush about Invincible Iron man and you can’t stop me. Because I’m wrote this in the past and you spacemen are reading it in the future. So suck it, hypothetical descendants.

Invincible Iron Man is better than superhero comics deserve to be in an age where the most popular comics are about the intersection of zombies and rape. What’s even more pleasing is that people are paying attention and reading this book.

Now watch as this issue severely disappoints.

THURSDAY – Not Quite Friday but Still Exciting, Must See Thursdays

Daytripper #2 (of 10)

(Gabriel Bá/Fábio Moon)

Vertigo/DC Comics

How good way Daytripper #1? What? You didn’t read it? Well, you missed the set-up for the whole series, plus some great art from those twins whose names force me to make extra keystrokes to include the accent marks (I live a hard life).

I’ve already made space on my shelf for the trade.

FRIDAY – TGIDinosaurs (still)

Age Of Reptiles: The Journey #2 (of 4)

(Ricardo Delgado)

Dark Horse Comics

Zombies and cowboys are surely tired trends by now. When will dinosaurs be the Big Awesome Thing in comics? When we will have a Devil Dinosaur revival and a DC Comics crossover where Dr. Light rapes a triceratops?

It’s a beautiful, meticulously drawn comic book about dinosaurs doing dinosaur stuff. It has no words, just great art. And this issue has prehistoric alligators in it.

You know you want it.

SATURDAY – Essential Reading, Long Lazy Afternoons, Cleaning the Gutters

Lola: A Ghost Story

(J. Torres/Elbert Or)

Oni Press

Here’s Oni Press’ book description:

“Jesse sees dead people, monsters, demons, and lots of other things that go bump in the night that no one else can see. No one except his ailing grandmother — a woman who used her visions to help those living in her small town. The same rural community in all the scary stories Jesse’s heard as a child. Man-eating ogres in trees. Farmhouses haunted by wraiths. Even pigs possessed by the devil. Upon his grandmother’s passing, Jesse has no choice but to face his demons and whatever else might be awaiting him at grandma’s house.”

Seems like it has cool art and pathos and junk. Oni Press is good for stuff like that.

SUNDAY – Last Issues, Oh Sh!t Tomorrow’s Monday

Absolution #6 (of 6)

(Christos Gage/Roberto Viacava)

Avatar Press

Absolution’s ending already? Granted, I haven’t been keeping up, but that was quick. It seems like only yesterday I was at Comic-Con 2009, pointing out my favorite bits of gore from Issue #0 to the disinterested guy at the Avatar Press booth. How time flies!In all seriousness, Absolution is a good companion to those Warren Ellis “Maybe superheroes aren’t such a good idea” books that Avatar publishes. It’s probably not nearly as twisted as No Hero, but it promises lots of ultra-violence.

Like a blob suddenly grow a skeleton, this column found a structure. So welcome to The All New, All Different This Week in Comics, where every comic corresponds to a day (with sometimes-helpful descriptions of what each day means).

MONDAY – First Issues

Existence 3.0 #1 (of 4), $3.50

(Nick Spencer/Ron Salas)

Image Comics

Despite having never read the previous series, Existence 2.0, I’m a bit interested in Existence 3.0. It’s a sci-fi comic (not nearly enough of those) published by Image Comics (who publish lots of quality comics) and features something called “consciousness transfer technology.” To become a better writer, I need to come up with about a dozen alternate ways to say “SOLD!”

TUESDAY – New Manga Day

Slam Dunk Volume 7

(Takehiko Inoue)

Viz Media

There’s not a lot of sports manga that makes it to the states even though there’s tons of it in Japan, so let’s take a look a Slam Dunk, one of the classic sports manga. Slam Dunk, as you might have guessed, is about basketball. Perfect for sports fans!

WEDNESDAY – Mainstream Superhero Stuff

Uncanny X-Men #518, $2.99

(Matt Fraction/Terry Dodson/Rachel Dodson)

Marvel Comics

Uncanny X-Men #517 was my favorite fight comic of the year–a battle between the X-Nation and the Predators that had like a dozen cool moments and Fraction’s trademark clever writing. I’m still gushing about the coolest use of Rogue’s powers in… ever. Anyway, the next issue is coming out and I couldn’t be more stoked. I can’t believe I’m this excited for an X-Men comic.

THURSDAY – Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Supergod #2 (of 5)

(Warren Ellis/Garrie Gastony)

Avatar Press

How killer was the inaugural issue of Warren Ellis’ Supergod? Didn’t it make you want to cry for ever dreaming a man could fly? Every night, before going to sleep with several women wearing lingerie made of money, I pray that Supergod finishes what Watchmen started: ruining superheroes for everyone. After Supergod is over, no one will want to read Green Lantern ever again. Ha ha ha–

FRIDAY – TGIRocknRoll

One Model Nation

(Courtney Taylor/Jim Rugg)

Image Comics

Hey, we reviewed that!

It’s a great rock ‘n roll comic, so you should read it. Buy this comic, crank some Neu! or Kraftwerk or something, and get cracking.

SATURDAY – Essential Reading

Unthinkable

(Mark Sable/Julian Totino Tedesco)

BOOM! Studios

Unthinkable is a great high-concept thriller about high concepts and how they can be applied to dangerous real-world situations. It’s a thriller so huge in scope and so globetrottery that it could only work as a comic book, where budgets are hardly an issue. As a movie, it couldn’t afford to have such smart characters or so many explosions. As a Tom Clancy or Dan Brown novel, you’d have to trudge through shitty prose to appreciate the thrils, chills, spills, and so on.

So I guess what I’m saying is that comics are better than prose.

SUNDAY – Last Issues

Spin Angels #4 (of 4)

(Jean-Luc Sala/Pierre-Mony Chan/Marc Sumerak)

Marvel Comics/Soleil

French comics: there need to be more of you in the US. That is all.

You know what they say: a comic a day keeps you from being charged for things like arson, indecent exposure, and public urination. Well, nobody says that. I say that. Because it’s my column.

Welcome to This Week in Comics, where every day is a comic book.

MONDAY – First Issues

Supergod #1 (of 5)

(Warren Ellis/Garrie Gastony)

Avatar Press

Supergod is the third installment (with Black Summer and No Hero) of Warren Ellis’ superhero trilogy for Avatar Press. You know what this means: the promise of fucked-up imagery, great ideas, twists, turns, shocks — all rendered in Warren Ellis’ trademark drunken cynical style. This is what happens when you take someone who has no interest in superheroes and subject him to a decade of for-hire superhero work. He’s earned your fandom, and now he will punish you for it.

Fun fact: As a teenager I drew a two-page comic of a superhero being crucified. Warren Ellis stole my idea, but I’m not going to complain because he scares me.

TUESDAY – New Manga Day

Cat Paradise Volume 2/Ikigami: The Ultimate Limit Volume 3

(Yuji Iwahara)/(Motoro Mase)

Yen Press/Viz Media

Cat Paradise has too strange a premise not to feature this week. It’s about a school dorm where kids are allowed to bring their cats, thus creating the titular paradise. Conflict arises, however, when a demonic cat starts stirring up trouble. We can only hope that Iwahara puts equal important on keeping the dorm from smelling.

Ikigami: The Ultimate Limit is much darker and probably features less cats. Reminiscent of Battle Royale and Logan’s Run, Ikigami depicts a world where people are chosen at random to die and given 24 hours’ notice to keep them motivated and stress the importance of life. Doesn’t sound as fun as forcing school kids to murder one another, but it’s just as dystopic.

WEDNESDAY – Mainstream Superhero Stuff

Batman/Doc Savage Special

(Brian Azzarello/Phil Noto)

DC Comics

To inaugurate DC Comics’ new line of pulp-inspired superhero books, we’re getting a crossover wherein Batman meets Doc Savage, who I assume most readers don’t really care about. However, the idea of a dual .45-toting Batman excites me mostly because I think it’ll infuriate Batman purists. I was the only fan of Brian Azzarello’s “Broken City” Batman arc from a few years ago, so I’m glad to see him return to the character in an unconventional fashion. Crime! Shooting! These are the themes of most of the books I’m covering this week.

THURSDAY – Not Quite Friday, but Still Exciting

Modern Warfare 2 #1 (of 6)

(David Lapham/Kevin West)

Wildstorm/DC Comics

Okay, I know I made fun of licensed comics in our last video segment, but really, I was just mocking Galactica 1980.

Modern Warfare 2 intrigues me for reasons completely unrelated to the video game. I liked the first game, but it lost lost me when it stopped being about Modern Warfare and just became a big James Bond movie complete with a shootout at the villain’s lair. Anyway, I’m curious about the comic because it’s written by David Lapham, of Stray Bullets and the recently-cancelled/always-brilliant Young Liars. His work tends to be harsh, so I’m curious how he handles a war comic.

FRIDAY – TGIV(iolence)

Punisher MAX #1 (Dave Johnson Regular Cover)

(Jason Aaron/Steve Dillon)

Marvel Comics/Marvel MAX

Jason Aaron, the mastermind behind Vertigo’s Scalped, proved his ability to write the Punisher with last year’s wonderful X-Mas Special, which was mean and unrelenting as only the best Punisher comics can be. Paired with Garth Ennis collaborator Steve Dillon, it’s obvious that Marvel’s hoping to recapture the vigor of the definitive Ennis/Dillon run. I have a feeling that, for Aaron, Wolverine: Weapon X was just practice for this book.

SATURDAY – Spend the Afternoon Reading a Graphic Novel (or two)

Insomnia Cafe/Luna Park

(M.K. Perker)/(Kevin Baker/Danijel Zezelj)

Dark Horse Comics/Vertigo/DC Comics

Yeah, I can cover two graphic novels if I want.

Insomnia Cafe is the solo record of Air artist M.K. Perker, about a rare book expert and a place called the Archives, which holds complete versions of books that aren’t yet finished. It seems like with Insomnia Cafe Perker is drawing with a style distinct from his work with G. Willow Wilson. The book does, however, seem as weird as Air, which is exciting.

Luna Park attracted me because of Danijel Zezelj’s name on the cover–Zezelj being the underrated Croatian artist who does loads of graphic novels I’ve yet to read as well as slightly more mainstream stuff like the last two issues that ever came out of Warren Ellis’ unfinished Desolation Jones (oh, I’ve gone and depressed myself). The story itself sounds epic: the tale of a Russian immigrant who becomes a mob enforcer in Brooklyn that somehow involves a look at New York City in the 1910s.

SUNDAY – Last Issues

BPRD 1947 #5 (Of 5)

(Mike Mignola/Joshua Dysart/Gabriel Bá/Fábio Moon)

Dark Horse Comics

I never got into Hellboy like everyone else (loved the movies though), but this BPRD miniseries is great. Issue #4 heaped on the pathos and made me feel for a character that I didn’t really care for in previous issues, and the series is leading up to a potentially great conclusion. Even if it’s a downer, though, it will still be drawn by Bá and Moon, which is reason enough for me to read this book.

Ultimate Comics Armor Wars #2 (of 4)

(Warren Ellis/Steve Kurth)

Marvel Comics

The first issue of Armor Wars was a hoot: a drunk Iron Man exploring the Ultimatum-destroyed ruins of one of his buildings. In other words, it was like reading a monologue by Warren Ellis in a suit of armor. One expects this issue will have less drunken monologuing in favor of explosions and drunken dialoguing. Fine by me.

Casper & The Spectrals #1

(Todd Dezago/Pedro Delgado)

Ardden Entertainment

Just in time for Halloween: a comic about the least-scary apparition in the history of popular fiction, joined by the least scary witch in popular fiction and the least scary Satan in popular fiction. I think the Harvey Comics characters have more appeal when they’re NOT made all youth-pandering (Hot Stuff’s got a chain wallet straight out of Woodstock ’99) but maybe I’m just stupid.

Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Music Box #1 (of 10)

(Jennifer Love Hewitt/Scott Lobdell)

IDW Publishing

Remember last week when I mentioned 1990s Marvel Comics writers who fell off the face of the Earth? Scott Lobdell was one of the major X-Men writers back in the early-to-mid-1990s who hasn’t really done much because he worked in an era when nobody REALLY cared about comic writers. Where is he now? “Co-writing” a comic book with Jennifer Love Hewitt. Whatever pays the bills, I guess.

Jesus, this is a slow week.

Vincent Price Presents: The Tingler #1 (of 2)

(Mark Miller/Alex Lopez)

Bluewater Productions

I was going to make some sick jokes based on the title, but I did a bit of research (read: “Wikipedia”) and was very pleased with the results.  The original Tingler movie sounds positively brilliant. Vincent Price! Spinal Parasites! In-theatre gimmicks! A fake black and white segment shot in color just so they could get the effect of bright red blood! Schlock!

Of course, we know the comic book will not hold up.

Hunter’s Fortune #1 (of 4)

(Andrew Cosby/Caleb Monroe/Matt Cossin)

BOOM! Studios

So, a treasure hunter book from the creator of TV’s Eureka, co-written with his collaborator on Stephen Baldwin’s The Remnant. One imagines that relationship went like this: Caleb Monroe typed furiously for days, using his own blood as printer ink, after which he sent it to Andrew Cosby, who took a minute of valuable time from producing his expensive television series to scrawl his name above Monroe’s. The result was then sent to Stephen Baldwin’s personal assistant, who gave a quick read-through to make sure the content made his boss look good and didn’t ruin a deal to star in a direct-to-video thriller.

But that has nothing to do with Hunter’s Fortune.

Invincible Presents: Atom Eve & Rex Splode #1 (of 3)

(Benito Cereno/Nate Bellegarde/Bill Crabtree)

Image Comics

I’d like to take this opportunity to congratulate Robert Kirkman for being one of the few creators to bring out a successful new superhero comic, especially considering that it’s a new superhero published outside of the Big Two. Also, for getting a comic published that includes the name “Rex Splode” in the title–the  REAL reason I’m featuring this comic.

I really need to get into Invincible.

Game X Rush Volume 2 (of 2)

(Mizuho Kusanagi)

TOKYOPOP

Here’s a potentially fun little manga: a two-volume deal about two beautiful boys–one a bodyguard, the other an assassin–out to kill one another. There’s some real appeal about pretty people killing one another in incredibly violent ways. I don’t think the full potential of this idea has really been achieved outside of maybe X/1999. It seems like Game X Rush is more about drama and gun-toting bishounen than it is about pretty people murdering one another, so I may have to look elsewhere. Still, for those interested it’s a two-volume investment, so it can’t be all bad.

Gravel #16

(Warren Ellis/Mike Wolfer/)

Avatar Press

Good timing: with the announcement of a film based on Gravel (we can assume Warren Ellis’ first draft screenplay will be rewritten into having absolutely no personality at some point during production) comes a new issue of Gravel. Warren Ellis’ name is on the cover, but Mike Wolfer does most of the heavy lifting scripting the series. So let’s buy it and show support for Mr. Wolfer, who is undoubtedly locked up in one of Ellis’ science torture basements.

Anchor #1

(Phil Hester/Brian Churilla)

BOOM! Studios

“Quirky action horror” is quickly becoming its own subgenre, and we have Hellboy to thank for that. Still, Anchor looks like a fun book about an immortal warrior that the ad copy describes as “God’s own leg-breaker.” Sold!

Batgirl #3

(Bryan Q. Miller/Lee Garbett/Trevor Scott)

DC Comics

Shocking how good this new Batgirl series is. This can be attributed to a number of good decisions being made, such as getting rid of that dreadful S&M gimp suit nightmare she called a costume. I mean, this is BATGIRL we’re talking about, for Christ’s sake. She doesn’t need to be “dark.” 

BPRD 1947 #4 (of 5)

(Mike Mignola/Joshua Dysart/Fábio Moon/Gabriel Bá)

Dark Horse Comics

Child abductors: the best way to lure me into your van is not with candy (though it is tempting), but with a comic drawn by Fábio Moon and Gabriel Bá. Someone must have told Mike Mignola this. Did I just imply Mike Mignola was a child abductor?

You Are There

(Jacques Tardi/Jean-Claude Forest)

Fantagraphics

Even though I covered it last month, I still haven’t read West Coast Blues. Having no money will do that to you. As if to mock me, Fantagraphics has released another Jacques Tardi comic, this time a collaboration with Barbarella’s Jean-Claude Forrest. The satirical You Are There features a man who inheritance amounts to a wall surrounding what was once his forcing him to make a living patrolling the thing and collecting tolls. The image alone of a man in a suit and bowler hat living on a wall is worth the price of admission–or publicly begging Fantagraphics to send me a review copy.

…is this thing on?

Air TP Vol 2 Flying Machine, $12.99

(G. Willow Wilson/MK Perker)

Vertigo/DC Comics

There’s a new Air trade, out and you’re buying it. There is no debate here.

Act-I-Vate Primer HC, $24.99

(Joe Infurnari/Roger Langridge/Mike Dawson/Nick Bertozzi/Tim Hamilton/Dean Haspiel/Simon Fraser/Molly Crabapple/John Leavitt/Mike Cavallaro/Pedro Camargo/Jim Dougan/Hyeondo Park/Ulises Farinas/Michel Fiffe/Maurice Fontenot/Jennifer Hayden/Leland Purvis)

IDW Publishing

Comics readers: do you ever think “Gee, I don’t know of enough talented creators. I like Brian Michael Bendis and the closest I get to indie is that I’ve heard of American Splendor”? Well, friends, I introduce you to The Act-I-Vate Primer, collecting 16 original, diverse stories from the surprisingly huge webcomics collective. That’s 16 things to get excited about. If you’re not convinced yet, IDW has provided a preview of the primer.

Nomad: Girl Without a World #2 (of 4)

(Sean McKeever/David Baldeon)

Marvel Comics

The first issue of Nomad: Girl Without a World was mostly set-up with a bit too much Buffy the Vampire Slayer “there’s something afoot at the student body election” intrigue, but the writing and art were good enough to warrant a look at the second issue. Hopefully it really picks up, because I’m really into this character and would like to see more of her. Also, I can’t resist a heroine in goggles.

Scalped #32

(Jason Aaron/RM Guera)

Vertigo/DC Comics

We haven’t had a new installment of Scalped since August. This is unacceptable, but slightly infrequent Scalped is better than no Scalped at all. Buy this issue and let’s keep Scalped going. I’m going to say this again next week when the next trade comes out.

Fixer & Other Stories

(Joe Sacco)

Drawn and Quarterly

The Balkans are a surprising source of comics creators, all of whom are underrated. For a period in the early 2000s it seems like the major comic companies were pillaging the place for writers and artists. Alas, still the region is best known for the Bosnian Wars that destabilized the region in the 1990s, covered second-hand by Joe Kubert’s Fax from Sarajevo and first-hand by reporter/cartoonist Joe Sacco. I haven’t read Sacco’s Bosnian War material, but The Fixer and Other Stories compiles it all in a convenient, affordable manner. What was I saying about review copies?

Haunt #1

(Robert Kirkman/Todd McFarlane/Ryan Ottley/Greg Capullo)

Image Comics

Ah, Robert Kirkman, the upstart revolutionary of the comics industry. His manifesto drove some creators to actually do some creator-owned work (I think that’s how Chew was born, thankfully), and he feuded with Todd McFarlane until Todd agreed to do a book with him. Wow, one of the guys who invented the 1990s is teaming up with one of the most popular creator-owned comics guys to do… another demonic Spider-Man lookalike.

Yeah, this is going to be a fruitful collaboration.

Batman & Robin #5

(Grant Morrison/Philip Tan/Jonathan Glapion)

DC Comics

I wasn’t going to gush about Batman & Robin this week, but then I saw that gorgeous cover that the interiors could never hope to live up to (sorry Philip, I enjoyed the last issue but…). There’s a beautiful simplicity to the cover that just makes it incredibly striking and powerful. Plus, it’s not a generic cover with Batman and Robin jumping off a rooftop in “iconic” poses.

No, THIS is iconic.

Chronicles Of Wormwood Last Battle #1 (of 6)

(Garth Ennis/Oscar Jimenez)

Avatar Press

Sweet Jesus: a Garth Ennis comic about the Antichrist. I never checked out Chronicles of Wormwood before, but now I may have to. What do we have to lose? We’re all going to Hell for by virtue (or vice) of being alive while this book is being published.

Thanks a lot, Avatar.

Incredibles #1

(Mark Waid/Marcio Takara)

BOOM! Studios

Mark Waid’s got it made, doesn’t he? He gets to be Editor-in-Chief, write what essentially amounts to Superman and Fantastic Four for the same company, and nobody’s going to fire him unfairly from doing what he loves. The Incredibles ongoing series is a particularly good idea, considering the startling lack of superhero comics for the lil’uns.

Criminal The Sinners #1

(Ed Brubaker/Sean Phillips)

ICON/Marvel Comics

Thanks, Ed and Sean, for making the wait between Incognito and the next Criminal series as short as possible.

Sweet Tooth #2

(Jeff Lemire)

Vertigo/DC Comics

It’s Jeff Lemire week here in this dimension (he’s got a story in this week’s House of Mystery #18 as well), so you better have bought Sweet Tooth #1. It only cost a dollar to introduce yourself to the plague-stricken world where animal-human hybrids are hunted down and a kid with deer horns goes on a Y: The Last Man-esque journey.  Let’s all buy this and keep Jeff Lemire working.

Athena #1

(Doug Murray/Paul Renaud/Fabiano Neves)

Dynamite Entertainment

There’s an Obama cover? God damn it.

War Heroes #3 (Of 6)

(Mark Millar/Tony Harris)

Image Comics

Seriously? This is really coming out? Issue 2 came out like two years ago. I don’t remember if I liked War Heroes enough to say it was worth the wait, but at least it’s back for now. If the next issue comes out in the next month, I’ll be surprised.

Astonishing X-Men #31

(Warren Ellis/Phil Jimenez)

Marvel Comics

As much as I love X-Men, I wouldn’t normally cover it because people buy this shit anyway. However, it’s an important issue because it features the excellent Phil Jimenez returning to X-Men, and not just any X-Men–he’s drawing Warren Ellis’ X-Men. This is gonna be guuud.

Kill Audio #1 (of 6)

(Chondra Echert/Claudio Sanchez/Sheldon Vella)

BOOM! Studios

Another week, another rock star tries to make a comic. At least this time it’s Claudio Sanchez of Coheed & Cambria, who’s no stranger to comics, having created The Amory Wars as part of the whole Coheed & Cambria experience, making Sanchez’ band some kind of prog-pop-punk epic. The Amory Wars was some sort of sci-fi epic while Kill Audio is about some troll that’s drawn exactly like Claudio and relates a bit too much to music.

Greek Street #4

(Peter Milligan/Davide Gianfelice)

Vertigo/DC Comics

I need to catch up on Greek Street, and so do you. We’re finally getting the Peter Milligan we deserve: the guy who does weird, idiosyncratic Vertigo books like Shade the Changing Man and Human Target, now focusing his strange eye on a bizarre hybrid of crime and classical Greek tragedy, complete with a chorus. It’s a Vertigo crime comic at its most Vertigo. Wonderful!

Strange Tales #2

(All sorts of wonderful people)

Marvel Comics

Reasons you should read Strange Tales:

Peter Bagge.

Jacob Chabot.

R. Kikuo Johnson.

Jim Rugg.

Max Cannon.

Jonathan Hickman.

Matt Kindt.

Michael Kupperman.

Tony Millionaire.

‘Nuff said, as they say.

What a week for comics: lots of great books are ending this week and one of my favorite series is being collected in trade. Also, I only made fun of two comics this week. We’re making so much progress together. Soon enough these columns will be bright and sunny like an episode of Sesame Street.

Speaking of Muppets…

Muppet Peter Pan #1

(Grace Randolph/Amy Mebberson)

BOOM! Studios

I hope BOOM! Studios is getting all the love it deserves. They publish lots of GOOD kid-friendly books like The Muppet Show Comic Book and their licensed Pixar stuff, which affords them the ability to publish more risky work like Irredeemable and Unthinkable. And some of these books are selling out, which is also exciting (assuming it’s not just due to limited print runs). The Muppet Show Comic Book under Roger Langridge is better than humanity could ever deserve, so here’s to hoping that Muppet Peter Pan, despite the different creative team, will be just as good.

Wasteland #26

(Antony Johnston/Christopher Mitten)

Oni Press

How regrettable is it that I’ve only just discovered Wasteland? Not only is it a fairly long-running (26 issues is a lot to me) post-apocalyptic series, but it’s got covers by the wonderful Ben Templesmith. If that’s not enough, Wasteland #26 starts a new story arc. Want more do you want? For me to pay for your issue?

No Hero #7 (of 7)

(Warren Ellis/Juan Jose Ryp)

Avatar Press

Of the 74 Warren Ellis comics released in a given month, No Hero is the nastiest thanks to Ellis’ sick mind and artist Juan Jose Ryp’s expressively grotesque art. The trick is that Ellis lures you in with his mainstream for-hire work, and then warps your fragile mind with his creator-owned work until you beg for more. For example, Issue 6 ended with our hero (who, as the title indicates, is no hero) ripping out the spine of an enemy and fashioning it into a giant penis.

You’re welcome.

William Shatner Presents Tek War #3, $3.99

(William Shatner/Scott Davis/Erich Owens)

Bluewater Productions

“Well, the kids have to learn about Tek War sooner or later…”

Wednesday Comics #12 (of 12)

(Brian Azzarello/Eduardo Risso/Neil Gaiman/Michael Allred/Walter Simonson/Brian Stelfreeze/Dave Bullock/Vinton Heuck/Dave Bullock/Dave Gibbons/Ryan Sook/Kyle Baker/Adam Kubert/Joe Kubert/Dan DiDio/Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez/Karl Kerschl/Brenden Fletcher/Jimmy Palmiotti/Amanda Conner/Kurt Busiek/Joe Quiñones/John Arcudi/Lee Bermejo/Paul Pope/Ben Caldwell/Eddie Berganza/Sean Galloway)

DC Comics

I can’t believe you haven’t been reading Wednesday comics. This means that you’ve missed Azzarello & Rizzo’s second shot at a noir Batman. You’ve never seen Kamandi’s Prince Valiant-styled adventures as drawn by Ryan Sook. Joe Quiñones’s beautifully-rendered Green Lantern. Gaiman & Allred’s wonderfully POP Metamorpho. The space-grunge pulp of Paul Pope’s Adam Strange. Joe Kubert’s return to Sgt. Rock. The parallel Flash/Iris West pages by Karl Kerschl & Brenden Fletcher. Kyle Baker’s Hawkman. A Supergirl that isn’t muddled in continuity.

Now you’re going to have to wait for the trade and it won’t be nearly as big or beautiful as the single newspaper-styled issues.

Eden: Its an Endless World Vol 12

(Hiroki Endo)

Dark Horse Comics

Dark Horse is so underrated when it comes to their manga. It seems like they’ve been doing it the longest–long before manga even became popular–by publishing stuff like Appleed and Ghost in the Shell. They finally brought a decent version of Akira to America and publish not only popular stuff like Trigun and Oh My Goddess!, but also ballsy stuff like GANTZ and essential manga like Lone Wolf & Cub. Eden: It’s an Endless World is a welcome entry in Dark Horse’s manga library, a thoughtful post-apocalyptic manga that draws comparisons to Akira both artistically and thematically. This book looks gorgeous and my wallet suddenly feels very, very empty.

Umbrella Academy Vol 2: Dallas

(Gerard Way/Gabriel Ba)

Dark Horse Comics

I think I’ve mentioned Umbrella Academy in every article I’ve written for this site, but here I mention it again because the trade of the second series is finally out. We were all unsure of a comic written by Gerard Way but I had faith, having read him singing the praises of Grant Morrison’s Doom Patrol. Say what you will about his band (I’ll start: The Black Parade is a terrific album), but Way’s a serious comic book talent. The Umbrella Academy is a wonderful superhero comic for the weird and dysfunctional.

Underground #1 (of 4)

(Jeff Parker/Steve Lieber)

Image Comics

Going off Image Comics’ ad copy, I can’t quite tell you what Underground is about except that it involves a cave explorer on an adventure in–guess what–a cave. However, it’s written by Jeff Parker, part of Marvel’s current stable of writers who thankfully also does creator-owned work. Art duties are by Steve Lieber, who drew a different threatening terrain in Greg Rucka’s Whiteout.

Superman Secret Origin #1 (of 6)

(Geoff Johns/Gary Frank/John Sibal)

DC Comics

Just what we asked for: another Superman origin story, because THAT’S not a story told far too often.

Geoff Johns can be a solid superhero writer (see: his original run of The Flash) when he doesn’t resort to continuity porn and “mature” fanboy bloodlust (see: Blackest Night), and Gary Frank is a talented artist who is currently forced on drawing Superman to look like Christopher Reeves. I’d like to see some definitive Gary Frank work, because I think the guy’s great but he hasn’t worked on anything substantial.

I’d like to establish a few rules about Superman:

     1. No more telling his origin unless you’re going to make up a completely different one.

     2. No more referencing Richard Donner’s original film. That thing is over 30 years old and its legacy makes for really boring comics and even more boring movies.  No more Krypton crystals and no more drawing Superman like Christopher Reeve. Let’s all put that silly movie behind us.

I no longer believe a man can fly.

Madman Atomic Comics #17

(Michael Allred)

Image Comics

Has it really been two years since Madman Atomic Comics started? And it’s ending already? The only comforting thing about a Madman book ending is that another one will start up soon enough. This finale features not only Madman and The Atomics, but also Red Rocket 7. Buy it and prepare for true POP bliss.

You got lucky this week, Internet. Fantagraphics doesn’t seem to have released anything this week and DC and Marvel published a few new notable comics that you were probably going to buy anyway. In return for this concession, you have to read about my weird manga interests and my MODOK fetish.

This list was easier to cultivate than the last one, but I don’t think it’s quite as satisfying. What does THAT say?

Pluto Urasawa x Tezuka Volume 5

(Naoki Urasawa/Takashi Nagasaki)

Viz Media

Naoki Urasawa should be as famous in this country as Hayao Miyazaki. So should Osamu Tezuka and Katsuhiro Otomo, but at least their creations precede them here. Alas, the world of Urasawa such as Monster and the wonderful 20^th Century Boys are relegated to the obsessions of those in the know while kids in Borders sit on the floor and read One Piece and Magic Knight Rayearth (do the kids still read that?).

Pluto is Urasawa’s remix (“re-imagining” if you’re into buzzwords) of Tezuka’s beloved Astro Boy into a science fiction detective story. I’ve read a few early chapters, and it’s deadly serious and just a little heartbreaking. It’s also only 8 volumes, so there’s minimal commitment to reading the whole thing — though it’s probably worth reading even if it was 100 volumes.

Vengeance Of The Moon Knight #1

(Gregg Hurwitz/Jeremy Opena)

Marvel Comics

Once again Marvel attempts to resurrect Moon Knight. If someone can explain to me the appeal of Moon Knight I would greatly appreciate it. Outside of his anti-Batman costume he seems to me like another Batman clone only beaten by Night Thrasher on the Derivative Scale. The only argument I’ve ever heard in favor of Moon Knight is that the original run by Doug Moench and Bill Sienkiewicz is supposed to be very good.

Vengeance of The Moon Knight #1 has Moon Knight returning to New York City to seek — gasp! — vengeance on Norman Osborn, who has suddenly become the principal villain in every Marvel Comic on the stands. Lex Luthor wasn’t so ubiquitous, and that guy was President. That Norman Osborn is the villain the comic says to me that nobody has any idea what to do to make this character sell and they have to make it a Dark Reign tie-in for anyone to care.

Air #13, $2.99

(G. Willow Wilson/M.K. Perker)

Vertigo/DC Comics

Look, everyone! A comic book not written by a white male for once.

No, there aren’t any superheroes. Or zombies. Or cowboys. Or heaving bosoms.

I see we’re not going to find any common ground here.

Veil #3

(El Torres/Gabriel Hernandez)

IDW Publishing

IDW does so many licensed comics nowadays that it’s become a bit of a surprise to look at the list of releases for the week and see something that isn’t Transformers, Star Trek, Angel, or Doctor Who. This time it’s The Veil, about a down-on-her-luck private eye for the dead named Chris Luna who moves back to her hometown only to unsurprisingly find that there’s ghosty things to deal with there, too. Pray it’s an ongoing book, because it features some great impressionistic art by Gabriel Hernandez.

Blackest Night #3 (of

(Geoff Johns/Ivan Reis/Oclair Albert)

DC COMICS

For many readers Blackest Night #3 is the hotly anticipated book of the week. I cannot tell you why because I’m still having trouble deciding when the book lost me: the convenient “Dead Superhero Day” that starts the book off or the utterly laughable shock value moments, like when Hawkman and Hawkgirl are killed only to be immediately resurrected as DC Zombies. It all sounds like a huge self-parody, but it’s played totally straight.

Considering that, I might be looking forward to future issues of Blackest Night in the same way I look forward to the next Judd Apatow movie.

Galactica 1980 #1

(Marc Guggenheim/Cezar Razek)

Dynamite

This blurb was originally going to be just “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA” and then I would have moved on to something more substantial (like making fun of Blackest Night) but it turns out Dynamite wrangled big-name talent like Marc Guggenheim (whose work I don’t really like, but he’s a name) to, according to the ad-copy, “re-imagine” the maligned Galactica 1980 — a TV show nobody asked to be imagined in the first place. This could be readable, but I don’t see myself reading it.

Bad Girls TP

(Steve Vance/Jennifer Graves/Christine Norrie/Daniel Krall/J. Bone)

DC COMICS

Quick history lesson: In 2003 DC Comics published this six-issue miniseries called Bad Girls, a Buffy the Vampire Slayer-esque affair a new girl in town who finds out that the popular girls at school all have superpowers and are using their powers for evil. DC to canceled the mini due to low sales, forcing the creators to cram two issues of material into the fifth.

Six years later, DC is collecting the miniseries in a trade for reasons unbeknownst to me. Maybe they’re serious about this “reaching new readers” thing. Regardless, Bad Girls sounds like it could be a fun (albeit derivative) read.

MODOK Reign Delay (One Shot)

(Ryan Dunlavey)

Marvel Comics

Of course I’m covering a MODOK comic book. I couldn’t NOT cover a MODOK comic, even if it is a silly humor book. There aren’t enough humor books in comics, anyway, though I think MODOK works better when played (mostly) straight. After all, he’s the Mobile Organism Designed Only for Killing. You’re going to have to look elsewhere for the Mobile Organism Designed Only for Comedy.

Regardless of my creepy giant head fetish: MODOK! In a comic!

In a perfect world, there would be a MODOK COMIC (Conquest-Oriented Media-Infiltrating Comic) written by me and drawn by Seth Fisher where we chronicle the absurdist psychedelic adventures of Jack Kirby’s greatest drug-fueled creation, depicting what goes on in his weird interior headspace as he hatches plots and invents things that invariably have weird, unwanted effects on hapless A.I.M. agents.

But alas, Seth Fisher is dead and you people make me sad.

Beasts Of Burden #1 (of 4)

(Evan Dorkin/Jill Thompson)

Dark Horse Comics

Seeing the cover to Beasts of Burden #1, I thought, “Oh, nevermind. It’s a book about animals.” Then I saw the creators: Evan Dorkin of DORK and Jill Thompson of various wonderful Vertigo Books. That said, this looks like a really promising book and I’m going to have to send Dorkin and Thompson each a written apology.

Oishinbo: Vegetables

(Tetsu Kariya/Akira Hanasaki)

Viz Media

Yes, it’s a manga about cooking. Most of us wouldn’t know it (even the ones who do read Japanese comic books), but Japan’s comic book industry publishes a much wider variety than America does, and I don’t just mean “comics for girls.” There’s manga about horse racing and baseball in addition to your Narutos and Fullmetal Alchemists. Oishinbo is one such manga, first published in 1983 and still continuing to this day. Viz Media, ever the bastions of Japanese media in America, began publishing the collections of Oshinbo this year, and Vegetables is the newest volume.

What audience Viz suspects to buy this comic I do not know. Considering it’s published under the “Viz Signature” umbrella with other “unconventional” works like TEKKONKINKREET and everything Naoki Urasawa does, they must be trying to court the sophisticated, open-minded manga reader who doesn’t give a shit about Naruto.

I’m right there with you, Viz.

Ultimate Comics Armor Wars #1 (of 4)

(Warren Ellis/Steve Kurth)

Marvel Comics

I know you’re probably going to buy Ultimate Comics Armor Wars, but I’m going to talk about it anyway because this is Marvel’s big book of the week and, considering Warren Ellis at the helm, it will more likely be worth reading than Blackest Night. Warren Ellis, you see, has read things other than superhero comics and can inject that influence in his superhero comics and create something that stands out amidst the usual crap even if he’s just doing it for a paycheck.

It’s safe to assume that, if the comics industry provided more opportunities to do what he wants that could also help sustain his lifestyle, you couldn’t pay him to write a superhero comic. Until then, here’s an Iron Man comic by Warren Ellis. You’ll read it and you’ll like it.

Readers: You’ll be glad to know that this week’s selection is more diverse than last week’s and features less of me making fun of unreadable superhero comics. In fact, I only make fun of two mainstream superhero comics this week. Baby steps, and one day I’ll be a proper writer. Until then, enjoy my incredibly biased, unprofessional ranting.

Chew #s 1-4

(John Layman/Rob Guillory)

Image Comics

Chew could have so easily been a high-concept cop show (“It’s “Dexter meets Medium!” – Entertainment Weekly, August 2009 Toilet Paper Edition), but instead is a really weird, comic book about a cop with the power to see the origins of everything he eats (except beets — his only reprieve). Instead of eating a different corpse every week and keeping his skills secret from his partner and the Chief, he’s immediately enlisted by the FDA, who have made poultry illegal because of bird flu and — just buy the damn book already.

This week Image Comics is publishing the fourth issue of Layman & Guillory’s Chew along with reprinting the first three issues. Now you have no excuse not to buy this comic. I’ve only read the first issue, but I can tell you it’s a special kind of book.

Fall Out Toy Works #1 (of 5)

(Brett Lewis/Sam Basri/Imaginary Friends Studios)

Image Comics

Fall Out Toy Works was created by Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy (you know, the famous one). I’m not including his name in the credits because he didn’t write the goddamned thing.

One can assume Wentz was trying to emulate the comic book success of Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance, whose comic Umbrella Academy (with Gabriel Bá) is one of the great comic book surprises of the decade. However, Way wrote his own comic and kept his music and his comic very separate to keep it from being a big wanky vanity project. Wentz, however, came up with the concept (something about an inventor who falls in love with his new android invention) that was “inspired by the ideas and lyrics of Fall Out Boy” and hired the guy who did Bulletproof Monk and The Wintermen to actually flesh it out.

Ultimately, Pete Wentz’s wanky vanity project has more in common with Tyrese Gibson’s wanky vanity project than it does with Gerard Way’s legitimate comic book project. And finally we have proof that My Chemical Romance is better than Fall Out Boy.

Incognito #6 (of 6)

(Ed Brubaker/Sean Phillips)

ICON/Marvel Comics

Ah, the Brubaker/Phillips collaboration. May it never end. Unfortunately, this is the final issue of their Incognito series, featuring supervillains in the witness protection program and the former employers who love them… to die. I was hoping it would be an ongoing series, as six issues doesn’t seem like enough for a world I feel like I was only just getting into, but maybe they’ll work on new miniseries detailing the further adventures of Zack Overkill. Their adoring fan demands it!

On the bright side, it seems that Brubaker and Phillips are working on a new Criminal series in the wake of Incognito’s end, so solace is quick and easy. The only trouble now is waiting for it to come out.

Irredeemable #6

(Mark Waid/Peter Krause)

BOOM! Studios

Fanboys: you should be reading this comic book. It’s got Mark Waid (the original Geoff Johns) doing the meanest Superman story you’ve ever read, presumably done out of bitterness about DC Comics refusing to let him write the character he’s been trying to do his entire career. I believe Waid is going to title the first trade “That’s What You Get, You Fuckers.”

Normally I’d yawn at yet another Superman analogue, but Waid tackles a less-explored take on the superhero mythos: what happens when Superman gets sick of saving people? What happens when a man with super-hearing only hears the bad things people say about him?

Magog #1 & Red Tornado #1 (of 6)

(Keith Giffen/Howard Porter/John Dell & Kevin VanHook/Jose Luisí/J.P. Mayer)

DC Comics

I’m covering both of these books in one go because it looks like they’re engaged with one another in an irrelevance contest.

To bring you up to speed:

Magog was the villain of sorts from Kingdom Come, a satire of Cable and the violent, “extreme” superheroes of the 1990s. Geoff Johns and Alex Ross brought him into regular DC Universe continuity in the relaunched Justice Society of America series due to popular demand presumably from Geoff Johns and Alex Ross themselves. He has a staff that shoots a laser or something.

Red Tornado is a relatively obscure DC Comics superhero that writers occasionally insist on using in their comics and subsequently struggle to make interesting (see: Brad Metzler’s Justice League of America #s 1-11). He is a robot that makes tornados.

Magog is written by the underrated Keith Giffen, so maybe the story will be good. We can assume Red Tornado series will be another attempt to humanize the character like comic books must do to every robot superhero (see: The Vision). I’d really appreciate a comic book where the robot superhero enjoys being a robot. Warren Ellis’ Machine Man simply cannot be the final word on that.

I dunno which is more preposterous: that Magog is ongoing or that Red Tornado miniseries is SIX issues. That’s half of Watchmen devoted to a glorified industrial fan.

Strange Tales #1 (of 3)

(Peter Bagge/Nicholas Bertozzi/Molly Crabapple/Nicholas Gurewitch/James Kochalka/Michael Kupperman/John Leavitt/Junko Mizuno/Paul Pope/Johnny Ryan/John Arne Saeteroy/Dash Shaw)

Marvel Comics

If this book sells 5,000 copies I’ll be surprised. It features major indie comics talent doing their takes on Marvel Comics characters in Marvel’s answer to DC’s Bizarro Comics, only eight years too late. To sweeten the deal, the series is finally printing Peter Bagge’s The Incorrigible Hulk, which we were all sure was never going to come out.

This is the only time you’ll ever see work by people like Dash Shaw and Molly Crabapple in a Marvel Comic, so relish it.

On a related note, I wonder how many people are going to look at that wonderful Paul Pope cover and think the art is “bad.” What do you think, Internet? Am I being too pessimistic here?

Sweet Tooth #1, $1.00

(Jeff Lemire)

Vertigo/DC Comics

SIGH: I can already see this book getting canceled. Jeff Lemire, of Vertigo’s The Nobody, does an ongoing about a boy/deer hybrid who has to traverse the post-apocalyptic landscape of America with a drifter in order to find a secret haven for other hybrid children.

It’s like Y: the Last Deer, only stranger.

The first issue’s only a dollar. Please buy it.

Young Liars #18

(David Lapham)

Vertigo/DC Comics

As one Vertigo series begins, another ends.

David Lapham’s wonderful Young Liars was about several things including music, crime, and the lies we young people tell to reinvent ourselves. Now it’s cancelled and I’m very cross with you people for allowing this to happen while you sleep on your piles of Marvel Alien Bonanza tie-ins.

ESPECIALLY if I don’t get a trade of the final six issues.